I am very fortunate to be able to work out of my home office on those few days I don't find myself on the road evangelizing the power and promise of IT Governance. Last Friday was one of those days and after seeing my wife and kids off to school, I turned to pour myself a cup of coffee and get back to work. To my surprise, the decanter I usually find brimming with piping-hot coffee was empty.

I put the kettle on the stove, prepped the French Press and dialed my wife's cell phone. She is the consummate Wife/Mother and spoils my kids and me to no end. Her dawn-to-dusk diligence is like clockwork and I found a break in her routine cause for concern. I called, not to whine like a hapless husband, but to see if everything was OK.

My unease was indeed founded. She explained how she was not feeling well, got up late, skipped a few things and planned to get back to bed as soon as she returned from dropping the kids - which she said was exactly what she had already told me before she left. Whoops!

Now this is not an isolated event. She toggles between the conclusions that I am either hard-of-hearing or a master of selective-hearing. It was such an issue for a time that a few years back, as a birthday gift to her, I had my hearing checked. The doctor said my ears were fine, though my wife remains unconvinced.

I am certain this "communication problem" is quite common, not only in marriages today but in every circumstance of human interaction. I don't have the nerve to suggest a concrete solution to the spousal example, but I do think we can take a disciplined approach in our professional lives and work situations.

I am sure I don't need to convince anyone of the importance of good communication. Communication skills are highlighted in almost every job description at any level of any organization. I underscore the criticality of communication in every one of my IT Governance-related presentations, but I dive deeper into the subject when delivering my Process Presentation.

There are 3 distinct Process phases: Process Design; Process Implementation; Process Management. Of the three, I spend the most time on the Implementation Phase because I believe it is the most underestimated and mistake-laden. I stress the organizational change management focus of the effort and spotlight its two major components, Communication and Training.

I tell my audiences that communication is more than "sending an email." I insist it is even more than "two-way" communication (send/acknowledgment). I propose a "four-phase" communication model:

• 1. Say/send the message
• 2. Validate the message was received
• 3. Validate the message was understood
• 4. Validate the message was accepted

It is not enough to just say or send the message and assume, well, anything. The sender needs to take the step to ensure the message was indeed received. And even if the message was received, it may not necessarily be understood. Finally, even if the message is understood, there may be disagreement preventing the message from being accepted. Communication can never be based on assumption. Communication must be validated, and that takes legwork and follow-through.

Though you can likely see why I don't suggest these tactics to my wife, I believe it is a reasonable approach in businesses today. I think it is a great model for Project Managers, who probably rely on communication more than anyone. Communication is essential in every aspect of enterprise success today. And there is more at stake than a cup of coffee.

Steve Romero, IT Governance Evangelist